After reading your notes I see what you saw with the "monster". That said to me the image has too much featureless blue to it. The first outtake picture you listed though I Really like. Maybe if the monster was lower in the image it would draw more attention to it. Maybe cropped right above the foreground bush.
A quiet, static scape with good complimenting colours. As it is, an empty blue sky consumes nearly half of the image; gradating it along with the foreground water, as you did, has improved the givens considerably.
Still, the horizon lies too close to the horizontal centre for a dynamic composition, especially since the (opposite) shore drops it even lower. As others have observed, the frontmost shrub has more attention than an incidental obstruction should have, attention the small tufts of sedge in the water critically need.
I think the inclusion of an interesting foreground object is critical for such an expansive, cloudless setting. There is no bird either, no moon to extend the view beyond the horizon and back, in the form of a reflection, onto the water.
For these reasons, I much prefer your outtake, the higher horizon, even the subdued colours and contrast , which render the light less harsh and leave us a moodier maritime scene.
The symbolism of mountain-fish swallowing another is, IMO, delicately reserved for those who find enough pleasure here to linger for a while.
Responding to your request for comments. I gave you a 4; I'll try and explain why:
Firstly, I certainly didn't see the 'eating' I do now but for me interesting landscape doesn't necessarily make for an interesting image and given the mountains are your primary focal interest point, I think they aren't really interesting enough to make up for a lack of photographic interest.
I do like the sky and the water - especially the gradated colour but the pureness of the water is ruined by the messy foreground and it may just be the light but the saturation of the foreground bush seems uncomfortably high.
Compositionally, I think landscapes need to communicate some depth and leading lines going 'into' the image really help - I don't see any here.
Trying to including a foreground element with a background at this distance was always going to give you some focus difficulties - I haven't really got my head around the whole hyperfocal thing but I'm pretty sure you've made things difficult for yourself here.
Gorgeous, although I hate even to say this but the tree/bush is somewhat disturbing me. I know foreground interest is good and all that, but in this case it's not working for me. Still a beautiful image. The nitpicky stuff comes from spending too much time on DPC! 7
if ya cropped out that tree in the front left...IMO that would really have improved this shot....to me the tree is distracting...I want to focus on the water and the mountains in the background more
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