This could have been a great photo, but the hotspots on her nose and the direct shadows under her nose and chin ruin things. This was caused by the onboard flash. Try taking the same shot, without a flash and place your model next to a window. The different will be night and day.
just a little to close of a crop for me. I feel like I need to take a step back from my monitor. Also, shooting from above really makes her look TINY. Maybe a more direct shot with a tilt would help?
This is actually a nice shot. Its seems a bit too close though. Your model's head is cropped out at the top and there just doesn't seem to be enough space around her face making the shot feel cramped. However, considering that the flash looks like it wasn't bounced and was mounted on the camera, I'm amazed you didn't get any red-eye.
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