Either this is OOF or your shallow DOF is to shallow for your own good for this challenge. I can't really determine where the focus is. Maybe in an 8x10 format this would work but at this resolution...
TC
The shallow depth of field worked out in this shot, but the part of the image that is in focus is insignificant in terms of the entire subject. The lighting is also a bit inappropriated to create a visually appealing image.
The reflection of the flash is very distracting, and makes this photo hard to read. The DoF aspect was done relatively well though. Try an indirect flash, or some different lighting.