This works for me, the only thing I can offer would be to sharpen it more and maybe get a little better catchlight in the eyes. You could also try to put a fill light or reflector to get rid of some of those shadows.
Great focus on the eyes. Very Bond-like features ;) The only nitpicks I have with it is a) I think I would have pushed the midtones a bit more, and; b) positioned the light differently to avoid shadow across the face.
That's it for me. I think this is a great entry for the challenge, good luck!