I had a quick look at this one in Photoshop, and you really need to do some post-processing on this one. You're not using any of the lighter tones here, and you really need to increase your contrast once you've adjusted your levels. A gamma correction helps as well. Once all that has been done, it's a good picture! 4
Nice shot but too dark. A suggestion might be to have your model wear a pale colored- solid (no pattern) shirt so that she would stand out a little more. Also, the dark pillow completely camouflages what seems to be a very beautiful head of hair.
The dark and light contrasts well, and her face has a daydreamy quality too. I find her looking at the camera to be a draw, as if she is encouraging the viewer to lay down and rest too. Her face is a little too central, perhaps putting her to one side could emphasis the 'come lay down with me' feel by showing a roomy space for the viewer to fall into. I like it.
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