Would have taken out the stuff in the top right corner but didn't realize there was no cloning allowed in this challenge! Didn't realize till after I took the picture that it was even there (obviously)!
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I'm trying to figure out if the pain you were going for was based around sadness, the strap really digging into her shoulder (not comfy!), or both. Anyway, it captures pain, in both aspects in my opinion. Setting it to black and white gave it a nice, dynamic contrast.