#1: (This one works best for men) Go into a ladies shoe store, pick up a dainty pair of pumps and ask the salesman; "Got this in a 16?"
#2: Go to your local big block superstore. Pick up the following items; A ski mask, 50 Yards of rope, a role of duct tape a large laundry bag and a pair of gloves. See if the cashier puts things togther. Be sure to pay in cash or this one might turn into a long conversation with your local authorities.
Goto an internet cafe and sit down next to someone. Type frantically into your computer. Every few minutes, look up and smile evily at your neighbor, then resume typing.
1. Go to McDonald's and order a cheeseburger but hold the cheese. When asked why not order a hamburger, say " I like the extra slice of pickles you put in the cheeseburger".
2. When asked "For here or to go?" say, "For There" and point to your table.
Go to Toys r Us, go to the bicycles, find a girls bike with a basket on the handlebars, ride around the store putting items in the basket, then ride to the checkout stand, unload the items onto the conveyor belt and leave the bike at the checkout stand.
clear liquid soap is always good on door handles, try it next time you exit a public restroom. or enter a public building. a little bit goes along way in the palm of your hand. the look of disgust when they grab that handle, priseless. also try it on shopping carts. ô¿~
1. Go to McDonald's and order a cheeseburger but hold the cheese. When asked why not order a hamburger, say " I like the extra slice of pickles you put in the cheeseburger".
My wife did this but said she just liked the orange wrapper they used on the cheeseburger.
Know those little poppers that you throw down and they explode? Take two and place very gently under a toilet seat where those two riser things are (usually just do the front two if it has more) and very easily set the seat down. When they sit, the poppers explode. I think my mom fell off the toilet when I did it to her...wonder why I'm out of the will...hummm
Also along these lines...I took a little music box thingy out of a necktie I had that played jingle bells. Once it is all apart it is very small and thin. I took it and taped it to a toilet, when someone sat down (most use in women's bathroom) it would activate and play music the entire time. lol The woman I did it to first thought someone left their cell phone in there but quickly realized I had done something. She said she couldn't pee fast enough to get off the damn thing.
Some computer/electronic stores ship their stuff wrapped in "pillows of air", not your normal bubble wrap but the long pillow looking things that can usually be ripped into desired length. The really good ones are hard to pop.
Take a length of about 4-5 and roll them up and tape a little to hold, shove this under a car tire (or even tape it to the tire for a little delay), perferrable the side the driver won't see. When they drive over them they all explode at once! Talk about loud! Especially fun to someone that doesn't have a spare since they now think they blew a tire. Much fun.
15 Things to do at Wal-Mart while your girlfriend is taking her sweet time:
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,"Code3" in house wares...and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
And last but not least:
15. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while and then yell loudly "There is no toilet paper in here!"
...2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
When I'm in a meeting, especially a long boring one, I will get out my cell phone and discreetly dial my pager, when my pager buzzes, I pull it out, look at the number and exclaim, " I have to leave NOW!" and hastily evacuate. Works every time.
If someone asks what happened, I just say, "It's personal and I'd rather not get into it."
...2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
When I'm in a meeting, especially a long boring one, I will get out my cell phone and discreetly dial my pager, when my pager buzzes, I pull it out, look at the number and exclaim, " I have to leave NOW!" and hastily evacuate. Works every time.
If someone asks what happened, I just say, "It's personal and I'd rather not get into it."
Too bad we don't use pagers in my country anymore... :/
